14 h 5 m, 2 jul 2021 ano - MEDIA COVERAGE 1 - 2 July 2021 Amber Heard Becoming a mother isn't all about you

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FROM THE DAILY MAIL:

Becoming a mother isn’t all about you, Amber Heard

By AMANDA PLATELL

What woman’s heart would not melt at this sweet picture of actress Amber Heard, 35, clutching to her breast her baby daughter Oonagh Paige?

Five years after she separated so messily from her wife-beating nightmare of a husband, Johnny Depp, the glowing Amber now says she has won what was always her right.

‘Four years ago, I decided I wanted to have a child,’ she tweets. ‘I wanted to do it on my own terms. I now appreciate how radical it is for us as women to think about one of the most fundamental parts of our destiny in this way.’

Amber adds she wants the world to think it ‘normal to not want a ring in order to have a crib’.

But is she right? Sure, the appeal of surrogacy is obvious: maternal ecstasy for Mum without the hassle of pregnancy or the pain of giving birth. You can defy biology and have a child whenever the fancy takes you.

Yet ‘womb-renting’, as its critics call it, is not a straightforward business. The baby has been gestated by a stranger — possibly paid — and the newborn taken from its birth mother’s arms younger than we would take a puppy from its. Thanks to donor sperm, there’s often no father to be seen.

When we think of Amber, and the appalling chaotic life she led with Johnny, are we enthusiastic about her prospects as a mother? The couple’s violent drug-and-alcohol-fuelled brawls were played out in open court, as this warring and vindictive pair chose to relive the hideous end of their ugly marriage.

That was a few years ago, of course, and Amber has been supported by her lesbian partner Bianca Butti. Let’s hope she is calmer today.

Yet I find her own language rather troubling. Not only does Amber apparently believe it’s her right to have a child ‘on my own terms’, she also says revealingly that baby Oonagh is ‘the beginning of the rest of my life’.

Sorry, what? How about the beginning of someone else’s life? Having a child, Amber, is not about you. It’s about the tiny, helpless person you have chosen to bring into the world.

No one has a ‘right’ to be a parent. Countless women who can’t have children still enjoy fulfilling, happy lives. I know — because I’m one of them.

Becoming a mother is the most selfless thing a woman can do. Forgive me if I have my lingering doubts that Amber understands that.

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