16 oct. 2021 - ROLLING STONE Lost Interview That Time Johnny Depp and Keith Richards Went Nuts on Me

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FROM ROLLING STONE:

That Time Johnny Depp and Keith Richards Went Nuts on Me

In a long-lost cover story, the actor and guitarist get pissed off about a skull ring and ponder sodomizing a reporter with a banana and tossing him off a balcony

BY ERIK HEDEGAARD

There are stories that, for better or worse, stay with you forever. You just can’t shake them. If I squint and close my eyes, I can almost see myself in early 2007 and how it went, sitting there high atop a rooftop patio at the shabby, glitzy, infamous Chateau Marmont hotel in L.A., with Johnny Depp and Keith Richards. I was, of course, all puffed up and chesty. It was just the three of us, cozylike. And under such circumstances, who wouldn’t be feeling good? But it didn’t last long, because Richards took an instant, vigorous, and nearly chemical dislike of me and was soon threatening to stick a banana up my ass. No smiling, no kidding. As for Depp, I’d met him once before and we’d gotten along well, over wine and cigarettes, so well that he’d requested the magazine make me the one sitting here right now. But today, he was as the dutiful, fawning son of a much-adored father, with Richards, some 20 years his senior, playing the dad part. I couldn’t blame him. But it was a little disheartening, given Depp’s long-standing reputation for being nothing if not his own man.

Actually, the evening started off OK. With a rouge Los Angeles sky lowering on the horizon, the boys were enjoying their drinks (Depp, a glass of wine; Richards, his customary class-act vodka) and their smokes (Depp, his hand-rolled cheroots; Richards, his Marlboros), and seemed entirely at ease throughout their demonstration of how to run a successful mutual-admiration society, palavering and preening on behalf of the third installment of the Pirates of the Caribbean franchise, in which Richards pops up as Captain Jack Sparrow’s father, which makes sense, given that, from the series’ start, Depp has said that he based Captain Jack’s louche, slurring buccaneer on his longtime friend Richards.

“He’s always been very gracious, very sweet, very nice, welcoming and hospitable,” Depp said of Richards, in his usual honey-voiced way. “What do I like about him? Everything. And getting him to play a part in this trilogy, it’s enormous, a major coup.”

“Oh, it’s been great fun,” said Richards, the subtler of the two in this particular enterprise. “Johnny and I have just slowly gotten to know each other, so it’s not like there’s been some forged bonding. It’s just felt natural, no big deal. He’s a very, very straight-up guy.”

I usually enjoy listening to this kind of harmless, genial plumping, but today my mind began to drift, and I soon found myself fixated on Richards. What a strange-looking man, so gnarled, wrinkled, and skeletal, like the worst kind of meth-addled tweaker ever; always with the groovy-cool scarf knotted around his head; a self-satisfied, world-class smirk on his face; wretchedly thin but sporting a potlike belly: skinny fat; and with conically expanding fingertips that’ve come to resemble nothing so much as the corpus-spongiosum head of the human penis. Very odd indeed. And then my gaze came to rest on one finger in particular, the right-hand ring finger, which has that great big skull ring attached to it, the one Richards has worn for decades. Vaguely, I wondered if it was somehow connected to the skull ring that Iggy Pop is known to wear. “The skull ring,” I said, “is that one of Iggy Pop’s skull rings or is that a different one?”

During the briefest of pauses, all light fled, darkness descended, and a sudden chill obtained the air. Have you ever been in the woods hunting vermin with a peashooter when a sizable rustling suggests that maybe you’re terminally undergunned? Me neither. But such was the case now. My hair stood on end, and prickly sweat savaged my cheeks.
Depp was the first to talk. “He’s the, he’s the originator of the skull rings,” he just about hissed, falling into the words.

“This is the original one,” Richards said, coolly. Then he came forward. “I’ve been wearing it for 30-odd years. You didn’t know that? You didn’t know that Keith Richards was famous for his skull ring?”

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